So last night the kids were watching a few minutes of TV before bed. Apparently Nick at Night was airing that old episode of Home Improvement where Tim the Tool Man contemplates getting a snip-snip down there. As I turned off the TV Dalton (age 8) asked me, ever so innocently, "Mom, what's a vasectomy?"
"Well.
You see.
Um.
It's an operation a man gets."
This, of course, led to the dreaded, "But why?"
"Well.
You see.
Um.
So that he can't have babies.
Nowlet'sgettobed'causeitisreallylateandyouhavetogetupearlyforschool."
"Mooooommmm! Quit joking around! Men can't have babies! Why do they get the vasectomy operation thingy?"
"You know, I'm probably not explaining it very well. Go ask your Dad."
So Dalton trotted off to the dining room to ask his poor unsuspecting father about the meaning of vasectomy. I hung back just outside the dining room so that I could eavesdrop on the man-to-man discussion.
"Dad, what's a vasectomy?"
"It's an operation a man gets so that he can't have any more babies with his wife."
"Oh - really? That's what Mom said too. But I still don't get it."
"Go to bed."
"OK."
So I guess we are at the precipice of that next stage of parenting - explaining the birds and the bees. How fun.
I remember when my mother sat me down at age 10 with a book, full of illustrations, that explained where babies come from. I didn't get it. In fact, I think I was almost 20 before all the pieces came together, so to speak.
So, readers, I am openly asking (begging) for some advise here. When did you learn about babies? When did you tell your kids? And what did you tell them?
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3 comments:
Here is a list of what happened with me, it also happens to be a list of WHAT NOT TO DO. My mom first talked to me and my little sister about that special time each month around 10. Her mom NEVER told her about that special time and when my mom was 14 she was playing football with her older brothers in the back yard and started. She ran in the house screaming for someone to call 911. I guess this is why she told us so early. But she brought it up a lot. Too much. As for the birds and the bees I kinda watched/learned that one from my single mom as well. At least I saw how a woman gets ready for a date with a man, at what point this woman and man move in together, etc-, but the worst part of all is that my GRANDPA and I were in Yellowstone with the fam and I just so happened to want to join him fishing one afternoon. His ancient truck had a tape player and the song "let me tell ya bout the birds and the bees..." came on. I was 12. I immediately froze in terror. He then began to tell me about the birds and the bees. I was mortified. With that said, I think if you can explain sex and body parts and feelings and urges and baby making from a "spiritual" point of view with honesty it may actually work and help. If someone would have told me that when you are in love (married) you do the most special thing together, and sometimes you can make babies when you do it. But if you do it when you are not in love (not married) it can hurt feelings, cause accidents, pass diseases and be very very dangerous. It's normal to have hormones and we are supposed to find a husband or wife and start a family, but those sacred things should only happen between husband and wife. (This is my belief/advice. Please take it with a grain of salt.) Good luck! My little guy is 7 months old, so I am really no parenting pro.
I just straight-out told them. Simple truth works best I think.
BUT-my kids were older than yours are now. I think he was 10 or eleven and she was 12.
Safe to say I think you've got time.
(my kids now say that although it was awkward, they are glad I told them in a straight forward way. And that they got it)
Just thank God you weren't on I-635 in Dallas traveling east while passing the Condoms to Go store. Awkward. But vasectomy is awkward too. Aye.
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